Is Comfort Zone a Place or an Emotion?

We are often encouraged to venture out of our comfort zones, push our boundaries and limits, and embrace the unknown. People say that’s where the real growth happens. I concur. Subjecting ourselves to new experiences is a sure-shot way to fuel personal development. Having a routine in place may or may not be detrimental, depending on the kind of person you are. Some people crave a time-tabled life, whereas others need a change every minute of the day.

We often try to stretch our comfort zones by altering our lives, such as starting a new job, relocating, trying novel exercises, or exploring new locations. These are primarily physical adjustments — you cajole your body into taking up these unaccustomed, exciting external goals to nourish your soul. But what about internal comfort zones? Are we open-minded enough to set aside the prejudices we have collected subconsciously over the years?

Mental transformation is unarguably more challenging than physical. Any change starts with the mind, even the physical. Encouraging yourself to expand your corporeal boundaries is often more fruitful than attempting to alter your thought process. It takes determination to discard years of conditioning, escape the chains of our preconceived notions, and declare, “Okay, I see and acknowledge this new way of living, even if it’s unfamiliar territory.” Personally, I find such people incredibly attractive. Their willingness to listen is commendable and praise-worthy. Yet, we don’t see it happen much.

Why are some people more flexible than others when it comes to accepting new ideas and ways of life, welcoming them wholeheartedly as if they were privy to this knowledge all along?

I would like to highlight one sector in particular to make my point: the Hindi movie industry. It is intriguing to observe how professionals evolve to keep up with the changing times. In the Indian series Gulmohar, an effervescent Sharmila Tagore, a senior citizen, plays a character that most in her cohort would have found blasphemous. Similarly, the iconic Madhuri Dixit portrays a determined mother in Maja Ma, traditional in some facets yet unconventional in others. A role many of her peers would have been unwilling to take on. Among the male actors, we have the young multifaceted Ayushmann Khurrana, renowned for taking up any daring character that comes his way. We have actors and actresses across age groups willing to change with the times. But these are just the minority. Most are reluctant to play characters who belong to the LGBTQIA+ community. Ranbir Kapoor, who’s within my age demographic, admitted in an interview a while back, during Shamshera‘s promotions, that he’s not brave enough to take up such roles.

Moving out of our emotional comfort zones is not age-dependent, as you can see. It requires a willingness to listen, understand, and acknowledge.

It is common to find friends and relatives who struggle to accept new ways of the world with its pressing issues simply because they find them unrelatable. They deny support despite knowing our backing may prove meaningful or pertinent to the intended group.

The most humane thing one can do is listen to the experiences and feelings of others and try to see things from their perspective without being judgmental. To sit with others’ thoughts for a while takes courage.

Sexuality is only one example. This rigidity in perceptions can be observed in a variety of scenarios. Conservatives look down upon women who wear clothes they consider vulgar. Feminists are thrashed because they are non-conformists. Men who display their emotions openly are often criticized by their peers and seen as inadequate to cope with daily tasks. Husbands who love PDA are called “hen-pecked.” We just have to take a look around to see the plethora of preconceived notions everyone, including you and I, are harboring.

The morality or behavioral police who preach righteousness are often people who have achieved much professional success in their respective fields by taking risks and boldly venturing beyond the boundaries of their concisely defined comfort zones. However, many refuse to embrace new lifestyles or cultural norms that challenge their convictions and emotional comfort. It is ironic to see them share inspirational videos about exceeding boundaries on social media when they themselves are not entirely free from the clutches of their comfort zones.

Sometimes it’s difficult to move away from what we have accepted so far as it’s an emotional state that we don’t want to let go of. Humans love their comfort zones — whether they be emotional or physical. An object at rest wants to continue being at rest. This theory is not just applicable physically but mentally as well. The discomfort of new fights, marches, debates, terminologies, laws, thoughts, and social media agitations build up our rage and make us criticize how the world is over-sensitive nowadays. Things are changing way too fast, and we can’t seem to keep up. It is overwhelmingly complex, and understandably so.

But whoever said we should accept the new all at once? Take it one at a time. Baby steps. Sit with the new, try to detach from the old, get acquainted with unfamiliar thoughts, ask questions (but kindly), and ruminate for a while. Give yourself time, as you deserve kindness too, to slowly break away from things you have treated as “home” until now.

But accept we should, if not immediately, maybe sometime in the future. To be a kinder person, less judgmental, and empathetic — traits that highlight growth as well. Acknowledging that change is a constant part of life and adapting to new ideas, beliefs, and perspectives is essential to becoming a well-rounded individual.

Shouldn’t we make a concerted effort to step outside our familiar settings, both in terms of our mindset and physical actions? Something to ponder as we continue to navigate the ever-changing world around us.

An Ode to the Non-Nepo Actors in Class (Netflix) and What Bollywood Should Learn From the Show’s Success

Class is the official Indian adaptation of the popular Netflix series Elite. But I am not here to talk about how good the show is or how different it is from the original. There are enough online reviews for that. I am here to stress the impact the actors had on me.

I was totally involved and immersed in the entire universe of Hampton International School. A big credit for that goes to the actors in the show. How often do you get to experience this engagement in Hindi movies nowadays? There are many reasons why it is not happening as much as you would like, but the predominant one is: most lead actors in Bollywood tend to look like they are acting. You see the actor, not their performance, which stops you from entirely immersing in their world, being one with them, feeling what they are feeling, and making you react to their scenes. You only observe them and see them as a part of the story. It’s difficult to connect with them because their star power often tends to overshadow their acting prowess.

This is where Class and its cast of actors come in. I see them as the torchbearers of hope in the industry and an example of how you could make a show or movie with non-famous faces and still have a successful project. These actors do not have a mainstream Bollywood filmy background and had to work hard to get where they were. And that effort is reflected in their performances. There is so much conviction and a feeling of realism so strong that you can relate to them.

When you see a show like Class with a talented set of actors, you immediately tag along with them on their journey without any effort. You become fully involved and feel intense hatred for some characters and love and sympathy for others. This is what good acting does. This is what immersive cinema is. You want more of these.

I was taken aback by how the young actors and actresses in Class had to wait years (some even 7-8 years) to get their first big break. By their age, star kids like Alia Bhatt had already become superstars. Celeb kids get a head start in their teens or early 20s, obtain enough time to star in good movies, and make a mark. By the time they are in the Class actors’ age group, they are financially stable enough to move to the next phase (marriage, parenthood, etc.). This is okay if you are a male actor. Still, in the case of a female actor, this can prove detrimental in a male-dominated movie industry like Bollywood. It is astonishing to see how middle-aged Indian actors are often paired with young women while their female counterparts of the same age are cast to play their mothers.

There’s nothing we can do about the nepotism prevalent in the Hindi movie industry except contemplate the unfairness of it all. It happens in all sectors and is not just restricted to Bollywood. But, in other industries, there are people to help the new kids in case they are not adept at their job. In movies, you can’t really make anyone perform for you. You have to do it yourself. So to compare it to other industries is not fair because such biases in the movie industry directly affect the experience you and I have, the actual consumers of entertainment. All viewers covet an immersive experience. It’s what we watch movies for. To escape reality for a while and to merge with another world cut off from your own. We have nothing to do with where the actors come from. But it is infuriating when the filmmakers take on celeb kids who have failed to impress even after a couple of chances, as it stops us, the viewers, from an immersive cinematic experience. There are exceptions, like Abhay Deol, who fit into any type of role you give him and make you connect with him.

I would love to see the cast of Class in more projects. I would love more casting directors to be like Sanjeev Maurya, who take actual effort to dig out talent, instead of going the lazy-ass way of trying the already-tested, the already-famous, who contribute nothing extra to the project, except maybe popularity and glamour. But we don’t need cinema that’s only about glamour, celebs with the perfect body and model-like features, or famous celebrities. People like me would love more relatability, good stories, and acting.

Until Bollywood learns its lessons, most of its movies will continue bombing at the box office, and people will continue to prefer OTT entertainment. OTTs have ensured all talented people get a platform to perform, which might be one reason why more people prefer to skip the theatres to watch content at home. Why pay to watch mediocre content when you can get quality entertainment at home?

An Ode to Rewatching Movies

It was an irregular day in my life. I had not watched any new movies or tv series in the last 4-5 days on any of the OTT platforms I had religiously subscribed to. This is huge, considering I never went a day without new content.

I realized the moment you subscribe to something, your mentality shifts in that direction of wanting to make the most out of it. You want to get your money’s worth. And once things turn into a habit, there’s no looking back. OTT platforms had become a habit. Not watching new movies or series in the last few days didn’t stop me from zealously adding new items to my watchlist, but I wasn’t tempted to start any. Was it saturation? Was I tired of the new?

Out of the blue last night, I felt like rewatching a 2009 Hindi movie – Wake Up Sid. I remember loving it the first time I watched it. I did not remember any of the dialogues. I only vaguely remembered the feeling it gave me back then – the mushy, soft, warm kind. I was curious whether I would feel the same way again. So rewatch the movie, I did.

It’s a rarity nowadays to watch a movie twice, mainly because you are subjected to many choices. Why go for the old when you can make way for the new? With the rise of OTT platforms, we have more on our platter. We add items to our watchlist, just like a shopping cart. We start multiple movies or tv shows and taste a bit of each, just like a buffet. Movie watching is no longer an immersive experience. It feels like a chore we need to finish quickly because we are already eyeing another.

There was a time when we used to watch and rewatch our favorite stories. By the time we were done, we were able to crack dialogues in the movie as effortlessly as the actors themselves. I do not remember lyrics or movie dialogues nowadays, but that’s understandable. Things stick only when there’s repetition.

I feel when we have more choices, we tend to become confused. Human nature is such that we are tempted to try everything readily available. Nowadays, surrendering yourself to one experience has become rare. There’s a mishmash of multiple experiences that you are driven to partake in simultaneously.

I couldn’t stop smiling while watching Wake Up Sid. The emotions are all contemporary, very now. It has aged like fine wine. Everything in the movie from 13 years back is still relevant today – the angst of a man who’s disinterested in regular office work, his journey to understand himself and his goals, and gradually falling in love with a passionate, ambitious woman. A woman who says with conviction that she’s not interested in him but her actions and expressions prove otherwise. Sid is very relatable, and so is Aisha. When the characters fall in love, you end up falling for them too. Their charm is such. The magic of good storytelling is such.

We don’t make such movies anymore. Is it because love stories are nowadays made with the male gaze in mind, or is the female gaze less fashionable? I doubt it’s the latter.

Would I get back to any of the movies released nowadays ten years or maybe twenty years from now? Would I sit and rewatch with a smile or cringe at the corniness of it all? Only time can tell. I think it’s about time our Hindi filmmakers resumed making feel-good movies again — so that the romantics, like me, have a decent movie to cuddle up to on a dreary, overworked weekday night.

Bollywood Buzz: Netizens Speculated Alia Bhatt’s Pregnancy Before it Became Public

I am a big Bollywood fan – a fact I’ve never given away in my blog till now. I wonder why because I have always been a keen observer of Bollywood, indulging in my Filmfare, Stardust, and Cineblitz magazines since a very young age.

As a kid, it was my guilty pleasure since most my age were into Hollywood. Hindi movies were considered uncool.

As an adult, I still stalk Bollywood and everything Bollywood-related. It is how I relax and give my monkey mind a break from overthinking. Needless to say, I am one of those people eagerly waiting for the new Koffee with Karan season on Hotstar.

I think my blog would be incomplete without some Bollywood gossip and banter (nothing toxic; I hate that) because it is as much a part of me as my serious, philosophical side. Two sides of the same coin. With the amount of Bollywood content I consume, maybe I could share something new?

The latest news to hit Bollywood is Alia Bhatt’s pregnancy. Some say she’s due in November. Some say December. But we will never know until it happens (much like her wedding).

A blind that was posted a few weeks back on Miss Malini got it bang-on. Most readers speculated the couple to be Katrina-Vicky Kaushal, but well, we now know the answer.

So, this Bollywood couple who took the plunge recently is all set to be parents. The leading actress and actor are pregnant and expecting the baby in December. Well, we aren’t naming them as removing the cat out of the box will almost be like stealing their thunder. But, you don’t have to wait longer as we hear that the official announcements will happen soon. We are supremely happy and excited about this news and are only waiting for the announcement day now!

You can read the whole post here.

Apparently, as per sources, the news was already shared with a few by Ranbir Kapoor himself during Karan Johar’s birthday party. Viral Bhayani and Manav Manglani will now have a new kid to stalk — unless Ranbir and Alia follow the Anushka Sharma and Virat Kohli way and they deny their fans and media any access to their kid’s photographs. Parents know best but I love celebrity kids’ pictures, so I am a bit salty.

P.S: Reddit had predicted the pregnancy way back (in April?) though I have personally not seen that post. The pic below was shared 12 days back by a Reddit investigator. Got to love social media.