Memory is such a weird thing. Some people remember the tiniest details about me from years ago, while others can’t recall spending time with me ever. They have forgotten entire moments. A day out, the day we talked, the laughs we shared.
I mean, how is that even possible? How can people erase entire days?
It also leaves you with a strange sense of self-doubt. Did you not make enough of an impression to be remembered?
A school friend, whom I reconnected with years later, couldn’t remember that we had spoken over the phone before. He was under the impression we had never talked. Another friend couldn’t recollect attending a wedding with me, which was actually the place where we first met. Even today, he acts as though we’ve never met. A few days ago, another friend, this time a woman, said she doesn’t remember going to a movie with me. It wasn’t just a quick outing. The entire day revolved around that one activity, so it was mind-boggling to realize that the memory had completely disappeared from her mind.
And then there are people like my niece, who can remember things from years ago with surprising clarity. Every time she brings up something I had completely forgotten, I’m both amazed and happy.
I guess this just proves that human memory is a fickle thing. It isn’t the perfect record of our lives that we often assume it is. So how can we depend on memory alone to define our current relationships or friendships and the moments that mattered?
Maybe someone, somewhere, did something incredibly kind for you, but you’ve completely forgotten it. Over time, you start believing they were never there for you because the memory no longer exists. You convince yourself there were no meaningful moments together, when in reality, they simply faded away.
Sometimes, forgotten memories say more about how the mind works than they do about the people involved.
It’s kind of scary, isn’t it? How hard do we have to try to hold on to the good memories? To make sure time doesn’t play the villain and quietly erases them for good.
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Photo by Baro
The Monkey Dilemma 
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