Tag: Friends

Sometimes the Best Part of Travel Is the People You Meet

Bhutan Landscape Photo

For me, the best part of travel is rarely just the destination. It is almost always the people I meet along the way. Sometimes they are fellow Indians I happen to run into while traveling abroad. Other times, they are locals who live there. Either way, travel experiences often become more meaningful because of the people you unexpectedly connect with.

It always amazes me how you can visit a completely new place and instantly click with someone. Someone you had almost zero chance of meeting in your life. Someone you may never meet again. There is something both beautiful and bittersweet about that.

For a brief moment, you feel understood. You find a kind of ease in being yourself. It makes you wish there was someone like that back home. A friend with whom conversations flow naturally, and silence is comfortable. But when the trip ends, you leave with the quiet realization that a part of that connection belongs to that place and moment. And you need to regrettably acknowledge and accept that fact and move on.

Now that I am back in India after my trip to the North East, I realize something interesting. What stays with me is not the destination or the sightseeing. It is the people I connected with during my travels. The random conversations, the shared laughter, and the small moments that made the journey special.

Those encounters also reminded me of something important. Even in my 40s, making new friends is still very much possible. Travel has a funny way of proving that meaningful connections can happen at any stage of life.

Of course, we can stay connected online. Social media and messaging apps make it easy to keep in touch with people you meet while traveling. But it is never quite the same as meeting someone face to face. There is a kind of chemistry in real-life interactions that online conversations cannot fully capture. The smiles, the sparkle in someone’s eyes, the playful teasing, the expressions, and the shared energy of the moment.

That is one reason why travel feels both rejuvenating and humbling. It lifts you into a small dreamlike bubble for a while. You feel lighter, freer, and more open to people and experiences.

But eventually, every trip ends. You leave that bubble behind and return to everyday life. Routine, work, responsibilities, and schedules slowly start filling your days again. Your mind may not be fully ready for reality for a few days. Part of you is still wandering through those travel memories.

Life, however, has a gentle way of bringing you back to the familiar. Slowly, day by day, you settle back into your usual rhythm. The memories of the trip remain, but over time they soften. The details blur a little. The feelings become less intense.

Until the next journey begins.

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Photo by All teams name

Dating as a Divorced Woman

I recently watched Jovita George’s “Dating After Divorce” video on YouTube. First of all, kudos to her for creating such a video. This kind of content is still not very common, and many women, especially in the Malayalee community, hesitate to talk openly about their divorce stories. So seeing Jovita share her experience really impressed me. It has also motivated me to talk about my own journey with relationships (and also friendships) after divorce. So here goes.

Lessons and Red Flags

I will start not with relationships, but with the judgments you face as a divorced woman.

This may not be everyone’s experience, but after my divorce, I often sensed a certain judgment from people around me, not always from my male friends, but from the women in their lives.

For example, a male friend’s wife suddenly became suspicious of me, as if divorced women are seen as people who “prey” on married men. No one says it openly, but the distrust in their eyes makes it obvious. This was especially frustrating because I have always been careful around married men, even those who were flirtatious. I never encouraged them as I was always mindful of what their wife would feel. Yet society is quick to judge a woman the moment a man interacts with her.

It also became clear that many men, both married and unmarried, see a divorced woman as “easy.” They approach you often for casual fun. “Friends with Benefits.” Because you are deemed as someone who’s not serious about relationships, because you chose to “throw away” a marriage. It feels sad, but it happens.

This stereotype gets even stronger because of how movies and dramas show divorced women. They’re often portrayed as someone trying to break another woman’s marriage — the evil, overly glamorous vamp who cares only about herself. You hardly ever see a divorced woman on screen who’s just like anyone else, someone who wants warmth, kindness, and love.

So a divorced woman who wants something serious needs to stay alert and filter out these shallow bonds.

Finding Love Again After Divorce

I eventually got into a long, serious relationship. We met through mutual friends, and at first it felt promising. But it soon went downhill. I realised he was never truly serious. And the reason was my divorce status. That hit hard. It felt like he was embarrassed by who I was.

That’s something divorced women should watch out for — a man can say he’s serious, but you only know the truth when his actions match his words.

The gaslighting made it even worse. He made me think I shouldn’t feel the way I did, even when I felt disrespected. It was mentally draining, yet I held on because I wanted the relationship to work. His anger and verbal jabs made me anxious, and over time, they chipped away at my confidence.

When that relationship ended, I was shattered. I had loved him despite all the red flags. But the truth was hard to face — I don’t think he even saw me as a friend. There was no warmth, no respect. It’s tough to process that after all the compromises you make.

That experience changed me. It made me far more cautious about getting into a relationship again.

Slow and Steady

After that, I met someone by chance. A divorced man, part of my school group. He’s someone just as cautious as I am, so we take things slow. Both of us carry scars from our past. Probably why we’re kind to each other. Even when we fight, we stay respectful. That matters a lot to me, considering my past hasn’t been so kind. He feels like home because he is steady and respectful. Still, after what I went through, a part of me wonders how long it will last, even though we’ve been together for years now.

We’re not chasing marriage. We just want respect and companionship. How long this will last, I really don’t know. When you’ve seen bad relationships, there’s always that little voice saying good times don’t last. He could be the one, or maybe not. Time will decide.

So this is what dating after divorce has been like for me.

And here’s a reminder for divorced women — other people’s judgments only hurt when you believe them yourself. Don’t bring yourself down just to fit their expectations.

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Photo by Rina Mayer